It was much, much harder. Let me explain…

There is a tradition in book publishing where a fiction author typically uses a trained actor to voice their work.

In non-fiction and biographical works – and Next Gen CEO is a lot of the former with a splash of the latter – it’s the author’s responsibility to sit behind the microphone, be the expert.

I went in thinking: how difficult could it be?

But within ten minutes I knew I was in trouble. And there were still three whole days, 10am-5pm, to go.

Here’s what I learned.

1. You can control everything except one crucial element

You can talk faster or slower. You can relax and breathe more naturally. You can even stop that habit of tapping your finger on the table when you’re making a point because the microphones pick EVERYTHING up.

You can focus on making as few mistakes as possible as you read. And you can stay exactly 15cm from the microphone so there’s no in and out on your voice.

But one thing you can’t stop, the one thing you have no control over which causes more retakes than anything else?

Your stomach rumbling.

When you’re hungry, when you’ve just eaten, when you’ve had coffee – and when you haven’t had coffee. In real life I’ve never once been knocked off my stride by my tummy groaning. Never even been aware of it. But no, turns out I’m a grumbler (though not as bad as a very famous celebrity who I am told had to sit with three cushions on his stomach to muffle the sound when he recorded his book recently). *

2. The difference between average and brilliant is the producer

When you listen to an audiobook you hear two things but you’re aware of only one.

You hear the author’s voice clearly but what you don’t notice is the producer’s voice. And it’s absolutely crucial. The producer is the golden frame that holds the masterpiece in place.

My producer was Perrin Slade. A hugely talented film and TV writer and director who also directs audiobooks. He is no mere technician. Instead he is the conductor. He dictates pace and energy. He picks you up, and picks up on you.

I mean, over 20 hours of solid recording he didn’t miss a beat or a misstep, a slur or a sharp breath. “From the top of that sentence again please, Mike,” he’d say, and we would go again.

Over three days you form a really strong relationship with someone when it’s just you in the sound booth, and them through the glass by the mixing desk, and the thing holding you together is your text.

3. There is zero room for error

You’d imagine that reading your own words out loud is not too demanding. And in one way it’s not; you know what’s coming next.

But in another sense it’s hard going. The moment you relax you start to transpose words, add connectors like “the” and “that”, flow the sentences differently.

But the point of an audiobook is it must be precisely the same text, just spoken out loud. So every few hundred words at least I would have to go back to the start of the sentence and begin and – and this time say it properly.

4. Reading out loud means you learn a lot about your own writing style

I always believed I wrote in short, punchy sentences. 8-10 words or shorter. That’s the rule.

But no. Turns out I can really mangle the English language and bolt words together to create sentences that stretch well into double figures – ones that look OK when you write them down (thanks to devices like parentheses) but which mean you run out of breath by the time you finish them fifty-six words later – like this!

And breathe.

5. There are some words you find, to your surprise, you cannot pronounce

I didn’t realise that the word “error” was difficult for me. Or “currently”.

Or pretty much anything with recurring rs in it (probably including the word recurring too). I mean wasn’t this something someone should have picked up when I was at school and coached out of me?

“Vocabulary”, ironically, is a tough word for me to wrap my tongue around. And “sandwich”. I’m from Scotland so my sandwiches always come with a “g” in the middle, not a “d”.

But Perrin put me right. With my new enunciation of the word I felt like the King!

I hope you’ll enjoy my audiobook if you get the chance to listen to it when it’s released in just a few weeks. Don’t forget to listen out for my intestines saying hello.

* Yes I know who it was. No I’m not telling you.

Best, Mike